Showing posts with label philosophical. Show all posts
Showing posts with label philosophical. Show all posts
4.06.2010
3.11.2010
LXI
Why do we have feelings for people? I can't understand. We just end up getting hurt and we can never be 100% totally happy. Okay, I guess it makes sense that we're only humans and that we aren't perfect but even maybe 90% happy, is it not possible?
There's so much pain in this world and alot of it is probably because of relationship issues with a significant other. Whether it be one-sided love, long distance love or any kind of love, a huge chunk is always painful.
Then people waver because of the pain, the neglect, the incomplete-ness that they feel and it just confuses them even more.
Fuck. Feelings are the worst thing on earth.
I have so much more to say but I don't know how to put it in words. I know it's cliche but really. I can't write about it nor can I talk about it. It's pissing me off!!
D:
There's so much pain in this world and alot of it is probably because of relationship issues with a significant other. Whether it be one-sided love, long distance love or any kind of love, a huge chunk is always painful.
Then people waver because of the pain, the neglect, the incomplete-ness that they feel and it just confuses them even more.
Fuck. Feelings are the worst thing on earth.
I have so much more to say but I don't know how to put it in words. I know it's cliche but really. I can't write about it nor can I talk about it. It's pissing me off!!
D:
1.16.2010
XLI
So to start off the new year a few weeks ago, I wrote two lists on two separate pieces of paper and taped them on my big mirrors (they're the slidy type that are doors for your closet as well). Here's what's written on each piece of paper:
Lessons in Life
1. Compromise
2. Look from ALL perspectives
3. Assume nothing
4. Expect little
5. Do more
6. Need less
7. Smile often
8. Sleep loooong and dream BIG
9. Laugh a lot
10. Pray
11. Once in a while... cry. But continue living
12. Sacrifice
13. Love is the most powerful thing on earth
14. The little things that you do in life can affect others in a big way
15. Learn to forgive yourself and others
16. Don't try to please everybody because you can't. Please those who are important in your life
17. Family > Friends
2010 GOALS
--> drink MOAR H20
--> stay committed to your skin care routine
--> keep room clean as much as possible
--> keep a smile on your face
--> grow your hair until waist
--> lose and keep off 13 lbs (tone up!) [currently at 114 lbs. as of 12/29/2009)
--> NEVER give up
--> stay true to your decisions (no mind changing)
--> save up to $300
I made a copy of each piece on my cellphone, a copy of the goals and stapled it to my agenda book and plan to write it on the back cover of my agenda book.
It's really nice to be able to read these everyday. They're constant reminders to me and it's just really great to be able to think back to these things whenever you're in times of trouble and end up smiling out of no where or drinking two glasses of water. Haha x)
As for my goals, my room has been relatively cleaner than compared to the past 3-4 years for the longest time xD Skin care is going pretty good. Water and smiling needs more work. $$ is doing pretty well actually haha (maybe cause I don't really spend and my dad always gives me weekly allowance =P ) Hair growing, you can't really help it as much but I know it's going pretty good. Exercising was doing well but then I need to start working on it again and as for staying true to my decisions, I think I'll scratch that. No progress on that at all =[
Lessons in Life
1. Compromise
2. Look from ALL perspectives
3. Assume nothing
4. Expect little
5. Do more
6. Need less
7. Smile often
8. Sleep loooong and dream BIG
9. Laugh a lot
10. Pray
11. Once in a while... cry. But continue living
12. Sacrifice
13. Love is the most powerful thing on earth
14. The little things that you do in life can affect others in a big way
15. Learn to forgive yourself and others
16. Don't try to please everybody because you can't. Please those who are important in your life
17. Family > Friends
2010 GOALS
--> drink MOAR H20
--> stay committed to your skin care routine
--> keep room clean as much as possible
--> keep a smile on your face
--> grow your hair until waist
--> lose and keep off 13 lbs (tone up!) [currently at 114 lbs. as of 12/29/2009)
--> NEVER give up
--> stay true to your decisions (no mind changing)
--> save up to $300
I made a copy of each piece on my cellphone, a copy of the goals and stapled it to my agenda book and plan to write it on the back cover of my agenda book.
It's really nice to be able to read these everyday. They're constant reminders to me and it's just really great to be able to think back to these things whenever you're in times of trouble and end up smiling out of no where or drinking two glasses of water. Haha x)
As for my goals, my room has been relatively cleaner than compared to the past 3-4 years for the longest time xD Skin care is going pretty good. Water and smiling needs more work. $$ is doing pretty well actually haha (maybe cause I don't really spend and my dad always gives me weekly allowance =P ) Hair growing, you can't really help it as much but I know it's going pretty good. Exercising was doing well but then I need to start working on it again and as for staying true to my decisions, I think I'll scratch that. No progress on that at all =[
12.19.2009
XXXVI
I'm so sick and tired of my church youth. Yeah, we have talent. Yeah, we're really good musically. But we suck at focusing and practicing. It's pretty sad that we can't focus properly altogether as a co-ed group when our leader isn't there with us. It's really discouraging. Plus, we really suck with money issues and meeting deadlines. We ALWAYS have to scramble at the last minute to pay for things and we aren't very consistent at all. It pisses me off so much.
Then, when we have meetings, not that many people listen. There would be people listening but those who aren't, are too loud that no body notices at all. It's really frustrating...
So in my last two years of public school, I've had these two girls as best friends. Let's call them A and J. I've known J since we were in grade 6 and we're really good friends and she totally gets me! A is a year older than J and I and she was a transfer student. I was her FIRST friend EVER in the school, in all of Canada!
The situation is that I think they're ignoring me. I texted A and J to go watch a movie but I've received no replies. I messaged A 4 times on Facebook chat and once on MSN when she was on (cause she never is) and I received no reply. I recently texted and posted on J's Facebook wall asking how she was and I received no reply either. Are they ignoring me?
Plus, the fact that A got invited to J's Winter Formal and Artona pictures makes me upset. Not only am I upset about that but I begin to really miss Pinetree. I saw the Winter Formal and Artona pictures that my friends from PT took and my heart just sank. I really miss them and I feel like I'm missing out.
Suddenly, I felt like my whole world got smaller. I see a third of my classmates 6 days, sometimes 7 days, in a week. School AND church. My world is getting smaller. =(
Which brings me to my next point. Who are my real friends? I don't know anymore. Am I categorizing my "real" friends with those who fulfill my needs? If so, what's wrong with me? How selfish am I... FUCK.
I'm going to go back to being inactive in the church scene starting the new year. *sigh*
Then, when we have meetings, not that many people listen. There would be people listening but those who aren't, are too loud that no body notices at all. It's really frustrating...
So in my last two years of public school, I've had these two girls as best friends. Let's call them A and J. I've known J since we were in grade 6 and we're really good friends and she totally gets me! A is a year older than J and I and she was a transfer student. I was her FIRST friend EVER in the school, in all of Canada!
The situation is that I think they're ignoring me. I texted A and J to go watch a movie but I've received no replies. I messaged A 4 times on Facebook chat and once on MSN when she was on (cause she never is) and I received no reply. I recently texted and posted on J's Facebook wall asking how she was and I received no reply either. Are they ignoring me?
Plus, the fact that A got invited to J's Winter Formal and Artona pictures makes me upset. Not only am I upset about that but I begin to really miss Pinetree. I saw the Winter Formal and Artona pictures that my friends from PT took and my heart just sank. I really miss them and I feel like I'm missing out.
Suddenly, I felt like my whole world got smaller. I see a third of my classmates 6 days, sometimes 7 days, in a week. School AND church. My world is getting smaller. =(
Which brings me to my next point. Who are my real friends? I don't know anymore. Am I categorizing my "real" friends with those who fulfill my needs? If so, what's wrong with me? How selfish am I... FUCK.
I'm going to go back to being inactive in the church scene starting the new year. *sigh*
12.03.2009
XXIX
"To be is to do. And the more there is on your to-do list, the more reassured you are that you must count for something."
This is a quote from Margaret Wente's book An Accidental Canadian: Reflections on My Home and (Not) Native Land but I read it from one of my textbooks in English 12 called The Act of Writing under the essay titled Busy, Busy, Busy.
Wow, that is a lot of italics. haha.
So if you don't understand what these two sentences are saying, it basically means that the more busy you are, the more alive and more needed you feel. For me, this quote speaks how I really am in an aspect of my life. I like to feel needed and therefore, I find ways to be really busy. I feel like I'm alive and that I'm contributing to this world in some way or another by being busy. The feeling of stress keeps me alive! It's strange, I know and sometimes I just want to breakdown and cry but I know that I have to hold my head up high and finish what I started.
On the up-side, if you involve yourself in something that you like, it's actually quite fun =) For example, I involve myself in church, my class and my school as a whole. I'm the social executive for both my class and the school, the secretary of my church youth group, a yearbook team member and being heavily involved in the behind the scenes of this play (and playing a part in it as well) AND being on the basketball team..that's a lot of stuff don't you think? But I like it! It keeps my mind off of things that make me feel unhappy even though some of these events bring unhappiness and stress, it's better than emotional unhappiness. =P
It's strange. It even came to the point where I'm starting to get bothered by the fact that my room is just so messy! I want to clean it @___@
So is anyone else out there like me? To be is to do?
This is a quote from Margaret Wente's book An Accidental Canadian: Reflections on My Home and (Not) Native Land but I read it from one of my textbooks in English 12 called The Act of Writing under the essay titled Busy, Busy, Busy.
Wow, that is a lot of italics. haha.
So if you don't understand what these two sentences are saying, it basically means that the more busy you are, the more alive and more needed you feel. For me, this quote speaks how I really am in an aspect of my life. I like to feel needed and therefore, I find ways to be really busy. I feel like I'm alive and that I'm contributing to this world in some way or another by being busy. The feeling of stress keeps me alive! It's strange, I know and sometimes I just want to breakdown and cry but I know that I have to hold my head up high and finish what I started.
On the up-side, if you involve yourself in something that you like, it's actually quite fun =) For example, I involve myself in church, my class and my school as a whole. I'm the social executive for both my class and the school, the secretary of my church youth group, a yearbook team member and being heavily involved in the behind the scenes of this play (and playing a part in it as well) AND being on the basketball team..that's a lot of stuff don't you think? But I like it! It keeps my mind off of things that make me feel unhappy even though some of these events bring unhappiness and stress, it's better than emotional unhappiness. =P
It's strange. It even came to the point where I'm starting to get bothered by the fact that my room is just so messy! I want to clean it @___@
So is anyone else out there like me? To be is to do?
11.07.2009
XXIII
You can think of Love Languages as either a bad thing or a good thing.
Bad thing: Use it to make people fall in love with you easily when you really don't feel anything/the same way towards them.
Good thing: Use it to make people that you love fall in love with you and for both of you to fall deeply together and keep the fire in your romance.
I hope it's more of the latter for everyone than the former.
I'm going to Alberta from Nov. 8-13 for a school trip. I used to not be able to wait for it but now I don't really care as much. I don't know why but the appeal just went down. Strange! =[ Maybe it's cause I just recently found this one girl really annoying. A whiny little spoiled bitch who overreacts to everything and is a total attention whore. But it's cool. After coming from a broken family, it makes sense.
Learned how to play 4 notes on the bass today and actually know what notes they are! I'm so proud of myself x)
Bad thing: Use it to make people fall in love with you easily when you really don't feel anything/the same way towards them.
Good thing: Use it to make people that you love fall in love with you and for both of you to fall deeply together and keep the fire in your romance.
I hope it's more of the latter for everyone than the former.
I'm going to Alberta from Nov. 8-13 for a school trip. I used to not be able to wait for it but now I don't really care as much. I don't know why but the appeal just went down. Strange! =[ Maybe it's cause I just recently found this one girl really annoying. A whiny little spoiled bitch who overreacts to everything and is a total attention whore. But it's cool. After coming from a broken family, it makes sense.
Learned how to play 4 notes on the bass today and actually know what notes they are! I'm so proud of myself x)
4.05.2009
VI
"Every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back." So keep smiling and be optimistic!
That is the core meaning of which I try to get across to people who are acting all sad and depressed. I wish they understand that quote and it's meaning and realize wholeheartedly that they're missing out on life; that they are not moving forward with their life by staying in the emotional state they are in. I know it's easier said than done but keep trying. Hopefully, you can learn to see the brighter side of things; and mushed together with your past experiences, you will know the border between being naive and being reasonable.
Hmm...I went pluck-happy today. I plucked my arm pits and my eyebrows x) I guess that's abit too much information for you guys, but who's reading anyway -o-; Nonetheless, tomorrow I will have to bleach my eyebrows again cause they're looking too dark. Maybe shorten the hairs abit cause I noticed with some ullzangs and J-rockers that they aren't long nor are they short as stubble. The eyebrow hairs are trimmed and mid-length. =)
Bio-Oil is doing okay. I got some pimples here and there @@ I need to use the Aspirin Mask again soon and try and dry my pimples out x) I REALLY want clear skin T_T It feels smooth and clear but the complexion is just dead ugly! D: Whhhhhhy!! Oh man, I will definitely go to Vicky Belo for treatments when I go back to the Philippines. Freaking hell, I don't care about the risks. I just want my clear skin T_T
I'll post about my facetrading adventures at Richmond today and a picture of what I bought from someone tomorrow =) But for now, I think that I should go wash my face since I'm about to go to sleep. That and I think that the pores on my eyebrows should be closed by now x)
That is the core meaning of which I try to get across to people who are acting all sad and depressed. I wish they understand that quote and it's meaning and realize wholeheartedly that they're missing out on life; that they are not moving forward with their life by staying in the emotional state they are in. I know it's easier said than done but keep trying. Hopefully, you can learn to see the brighter side of things; and mushed together with your past experiences, you will know the border between being naive and being reasonable.
Hmm...I went pluck-happy today. I plucked my arm pits and my eyebrows x) I guess that's abit too much information for you guys, but who's reading anyway -o-; Nonetheless, tomorrow I will have to bleach my eyebrows again cause they're looking too dark. Maybe shorten the hairs abit cause I noticed with some ullzangs and J-rockers that they aren't long nor are they short as stubble. The eyebrow hairs are trimmed and mid-length. =)
Bio-Oil is doing okay. I got some pimples here and there @@ I need to use the Aspirin Mask again soon and try and dry my pimples out x) I REALLY want clear skin T_T It feels smooth and clear but the complexion is just dead ugly! D: Whhhhhhy!! Oh man, I will definitely go to Vicky Belo for treatments when I go back to the Philippines. Freaking hell, I don't care about the risks. I just want my clear skin T_T
I'll post about my facetrading adventures at Richmond today and a picture of what I bought from someone tomorrow =) But for now, I think that I should go wash my face since I'm about to go to sleep. That and I think that the pores on my eyebrows should be closed by now x)
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